You ever wonder where writers come up with movie titles?

Half the time, the titles make sense and we understand what the movie is going to be about. “Date Night,” “Death at a Funeral” and especially “Hot Tub Time Machine” are pretty self-explanatory.

But there are some movie names that I just don’t get.

So I’m going to play a game. Looking at a list of movies coming out this summer, I’m gonna take a stab at what each one is about without having read a description or looked at the poster. Game on, Hollywood.

Mother's Day

“Iron Man 2” – The story of Iron Man’s son, Iron Man II.

“Letters to Juliet” – the follow-up to “Dear John.”

“Stone” – The Rock has an identity crisis.

“Mother’s Day” – a loving story about a family celebrating Mother’s Day.

“Robin Hood” – a white man named Robin moves to the Bronx. Hilarity and cultural understanding ensue.

“Shrek 4 Ever After” – Shrek becomes immortal.


“Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” – A prince must defeat an opponent in Pictionary before the sand in the timer runs out.

“Sex and the City 2” – everyone has sex twice?

“Killers” – A band of ordinary citizens are hired by the CIA to assassinate terrorists. “Mr. Brightside” plays in the background.

“Marmaduke” – a documentary of how the jam gets made, from the factory to your kitchen! Wait… that’s marmalade

“Splice” – Slacker bio majors start a pizza chain in NYC.

“Get him to the Greek” – A dude must transport another dude to Greece, perhaps to consult with the mythological Greek gods about an STD.

“The A-Team” – Well they had to name the movie this, no one would go watch the flippin’ C-Team.

Jonah Hex

“Jonah Hex” – Jonah Hill plays a cursed teenager.

“Grown Ups” – a spin-off of “Parenthood”?

“Eclipse” – Sequel to “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” but in documentary form. Morgan Freeman narrates.

“Knight and Day” – Story of an insomniac horseman.

“The Last Airbender” – Two hotshot Frisbee teams from opposite sides of the track face off to see who will rule the park (coincidentally positioned between their neighborhoods) for the summer.

“Leaves of Grass” – A gardener creates a mutant. It’s Frankenstein for the botanist.

“Predators” – Human traffickers are pursued by cops.

Despicable Me

“Despicable Me” – A serious, Oscar-worthy drama about a woman’s descent into drug use.

“Inception” – A porno?

“The Sorcerer’s Apprentice” – Harry Potter looks back on his childhood. Dumbledore narrates.

“Ramona and Beezus” – A tale of two lovers. It is uncertain whether one of them is a cartoon.

“Salt” – Morgan Spurlock eats nothing but sodium for 30 days.

“Beastly” – Sequel to “Beauty and the Beast.” The Beast gets his revenge.


“I Love You Philip Morris” – It’s “Win a Date with Tad Hamilton,” but for guys.

“The Other Guys” – The ones who didn’t win a date with Tad Hamilton.

“Eat Pray Love” – An overweight, middle-aged woman comes to terms with her body, and life and religion in the process.

“Priest” – A church father looks back and tells his coming-of-age tale. Mel Gibson directs.

“Scott Pilgrim v. the World” – A grueling look at pilgrims coming over on the Santa Maria; they fight the Native Americans for territory.

“The Expendables” – Story of those who auditioned but didn’t get cast in “The A-Team.”

“Takers” – Shoplifters fight the system.

– Sonya Chudgar